Evangelical Tears

In what might be the best news I’ve heard in months, Jimmy Dobson is threatening to boycott the November election. And he wants to take his fanatic delussional followers with him.

James Dobson, the idiot founder of the conservative, evangelical advocacy group Focus on the Family, has delivered a blow to John McCain — by saying he won’t vote for him if he’s the Republican presidential nominee.

“I am convinced Sen. McCain is not a conservative, and in fact, has gone out of his way to stick his thumb in the eyes of those who are … I cannot, and will not, vote for Sen. John McCain, as a matter of conscience,” he said in a statement on Tuesday.

“I believe this general election will offer the worst choices for president in my lifetime. I certainly can’t vote for Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama based on their virulently anti-family policy positions. If these are the nominees in November, I simply will not cast a ballot for president for the first time in my life,” he said.

Dobson said he was just expressing his views as a private citizen — but many of his millions of sheep in the evangelical community, who listen to his radio show and read his books, will take it as a signal to do the same.

What’s got Jimmy so fired up?

Do you think it’s because McCain is pro-choice?

Of course he’s not.

Do you think it’s because McCain wants to get us out of Iraq too soon?

Hell, he wants us there forever.

Maybe Dobson is worried McCain’s fiscal policy or plan for health insurance will hurt families.

Doubt it, since McCain hasn’t talked much about either.

No, Dobson’s issues are much more vital to America.

Dobson said McCain’s failure to support a constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage and his support for embryonic stem-cell research among other things were beyond the Christian conservative pale.

Stay home, Jimmy boy. And keep your idiot flock with you.

It will be the best thing you’ve ever done for your country.

Perhaps there IS a god after all.