republicans Are A Joke

Just This About That - May 7. 2010

Posted by NanceGreggs in General Discussion: Presidency
Fri May 07th 2010, 09:17 PM

 

It would almost seem appropriate to label this the week the GOP jumped the shark – and I say “almost”, because as things are unfolding, every week is now jump-the-shark week where our friends are concerned.

I wonder if they realize how difficult it is to reach across the aisle, when the aisle is continually littered with people rolling in it, doubled-over with laughter.

With so much you’ve got to be fuckin’ kidding me eye-rolling going on among the saner among us, it’s hard to imagine that our dumber-than-dumb GOP counterparts were once in control of a nation – unless, of course, you look at the state of the nation, and realize that we are where we are due to that not-so-long-ago fact.

Hmmm, where to begin …

Well, when in doubt, I always like to start with the topic of Hypocrisy, Thy Name is Republican Christian Values, a subject that never seems to go out of style – or run out of suitable material.

This week’s contestant (Come on down!) is Straighter-Than-Thee, Thou, or Anyone Else George Rekker, co-founder of the Family Research Council, anti-gay spokesman, and self-appointed saviour of those who require savin’ from the evils of the homosexual lifestyle. Since being caught by witnesses, and in photos, returning from a ten-day European jaunt with a “traveling companion” he found on the Rentboy website, Mr. Rekker’s story has changed more times than the Bible has been rewritten.

Honestly, I can understand Mr. Rekker’s confusion. I’m sure that millions of vacationers who require someone to “haul their luggage” wind up on websites that advertise the smoothness of their eager-to-please luggage-haulers’ asses, not to mention their cut/uncut status. It’s a dangerous world out there – and one wouldn’t want to be stuck in Europe for ten days with someone who didn’t fit the bill, so to speak.

Then there’s Karl Rove’s latest remarks about the GOP comin’ back – and comin’ back strong! Yeah, a ha, whatever.

It’s all pretty much in-the-bag now. All the GOP has to do to win big in November is (a) raise money from the middle-class who are holding on to every dime (because the Republicans have told them their taxes have gone UP, and will go up even more under Obama), (b) convince the saner elements of the heretofore party loyalists that they have better “go slow, start over” healthcare reform ideas that they simply forgot to implement during their years in power, (c) explain how you can barter your way to bypass surgery even if you don’t raise chickens in your backyard, (d) can safely place the nation in the hands of intelligent, well-informed people with names like Palin, Bachman, and BUSH (oh my!), (e) get all of those illegal-looking Hispanic voters on board, and the appropriately designated (f-as-in fuck) admonishment to look to the political leanings of good Christian leaders, who have championed right-wing causes for years as shining examples of Republican moral standards - which clearly set them apart from homosexual predators who peruse websites like Rentboy when in need of a traveling companion who will “haul luggage”, undoubtedly with Christ in their hearts.

If one is looking for the jump-the-sharkiest move in a jump-the-shark week, one need only know that Michael Brown has now been repeatedly tapped to opine on Obama’s handling of the current oil spill disaster in the Gulf. FOX-News defended their choice of Heckjovajob as the appropriate spokesperson on the topic because he knows whereof he speaks when it comes to disaster response being FUBAR. Well, no argument there – Brownie’s your guy. Just wonderin’ how his reminding the nation of how fucked up things can become when a Republican so-called president appoints a know-nothing/do-nothing idiot to head a vital organization like FEMA is going to help with that aforementioned GOTV initiative Rove is so confident about – but hey, what do I know?

Then there’s Joe “The Ho” Lieberman – and anyone who buys that not a Republican, but an Independent label isn’t reading this; they’re too busy trying to figure out why they haven’t received their fifteen million dollars from that nice man in Algeria who contacted them via email, or how they can move the Brooklyn Bridge – which they bought outright, fair-and-square – to their trailer park.

Joe-Ho is advocating the Terrorist Expatriation Act (TEA), which would amend current law to allow the State Department to revoke the citizenship of Americans they deem to be members of foreign terrorist organizations.

We all know Joe – we went to high school with him, or his counterpart. He was the guy who decided that “here come da judge” was the sure-fire phrase of the moment years after Laugh In went off the air – in the same way Joe has decided that the Teabagger movement is the wave of the future and he’s goin’ to catch it before it fades into obscurity – or weeks after it already has, whichever comes last.

Of course, no shark-jumpery would be complete without another boneheaded statement from John Boehner Bonehead himself, who recently opined that the Times Square wannabe bomber incident showed that “we got lucky, but luck is not an effective strategy for fighting terrorism.”

He’s so right. Too bad we didn’t “get lucky” when Dubya was in office pre-911. Had he heeded the warnings of the intelligence people around him about “increased chatter”, or the wording of the August 2001 briefing (obscurely entitled with something about Bin Laden being determined to strike in the US), who knows how “lucky” we would have been?

From the You Can’t Make This Shit Up desk here at one of the many Stuff You’ll Never Hear About On MSM News Broadcasts websites, I am over – but never out.
.
.
.
.