Desperate republicans

Bottom of Barrel Now Officially Scraped

Posted by NanceGreggs in General Discussion: Presidency
Tue May 04th 2010, 07:48 PM

We’ve been treated to it all week by the news media, folks – a never-ending attempt to label the BP oil spill disaster as Obama’s Katrina. And I’ve got to give the right-wingnuts credit where it’s due: they have been relentless on the topic.

Never before have so many “newscasters” twisted themselves into a pretzel in order to compare a natural disaster (a hurricane, the probable impact of which was forewarned) to the spewing of millions of gallons of oil into the Gulf of Mexico – due not to nature, but the greed of British Petroleum (which greed, I grant you, has come to be accepted as “natural” in and of itself) in not putting safety measures in place that would have mitigated the damage now being caused.

But that’s a pretzel that won’t choke this president – because the idea is so patently ridiculous, it is downright laughable. And the alleged journalists who are promoting this meme are looking more and more like a game of "Twister" gone terribly awry.

While Katrina and its aftermath will go down in history as proof positive of George W. Bush’s unprecedented failure as a leader (and unprecendentin’ is hard work, heh, heh), it is former FEMA head Michael Brown, a.k.a Blunder-Puss who will be remembered as the face of a tragedy that left a city in ruins, its inhabitants devastated, and many of its citizens dead.

So what better way to try and connect one event with the other than for Neil Cavuto (FAUX-News) to have Michael “Heck of a Job, Brownie” guest on his show the other night – in an A-for-Effort attempt to get his brain-dead audience to think to themselves, “Yeah, he’s rite – the too eventz are egsactly the same.” (I suspect Cavuto’s fans think in mis-spellings because – well, why wouldn’t they?)

And this is where the hilarity begins.

Prompted by Cavuto asking him where he sees the similarities between Katrina and the oil spill disaster, Brown states: “First of all, you have a disaster occur, and the Coast Guard shows up immediately. That’s their job. In Katrina, FEMA showed up immediately. The president is off in San Diego strumming the guitar. Obama is back East going to the White House Correspondents Dinner. You’re now nine days into the storm — into the disaster, and actually now, only now is the president appearing to be engaged.”

The fact is that Obama didn’t appear to be engaged; he has been engaged from day one. I suppose that kind of presidentin’ is so foreign to Brownie, he can’t wrap his head around the concept.

Of course, we all know that Brownie and his ilk firmly believe that Obama should have been in the gulf from the outset, armed with a mop and pail, shufflin’ and cleanin’ up the mess made by someone else, ‘cause that’s what his kind of people do, right? That’s their job.

“You’re nine days into the storm – into the disaster …” Looks like Brownie’s Freudian slip is showing beneath his too-little-too-late “FEMA showed up” skirt.

Yes, Mikey, we all remember how you, as head of FEMA, “showed up”.

Two days after Katrina hit, Marty Bahamonde, a FEMA employee in NOLA, told Brown that "the situation is past critical", citing a litany of on-the-ground problems – including the fact that many people were near death, and food and water were running out at the Superdome.

Brown's response, in its entirety, was: “Thanks for the update. Anything specific I need to do or tweak?” .

Nope. Nuthin’ at all, Mikey – or maybe you could use the down time to “correct” your on-line FEMA resume – you know, the part where you claimed to have worked for the city of Edmond, Okla., from 1975 to 1978 overseeing the emergency services division. According to Claudia Deakins, head of public relations for the city of Edmond, you were an assistant to the city manager from 1977 to 1980, and had no authority over other employees. "The assistant is more like an intern,” said Deakins. So much for truth in Mikey Brown advertising.

But Cavuto soldiers on: “So, Michael, you don’t take him (Obama) at face value when he says a temporary halt in offshore drilling is just that, a temporary halt?”

Well, given an opening like that, you’ve got to know Mikey is going to put his foot in his Mississippi mud-like mouth: “No, no. Look, Bill Nelson — and, you know, they don’t say these things without it being coordinated. And so now you’re looking at this oil slick approaching, you know, the Louisiana shore, according to certain — NOAA and other places, if the winds are right, it will go up the East Coast. This is exactly what they want, because now he can pander to the environmentalists and say, ‘I’m going to shut it down because it’s too dangerous …’”

So this is exactly what “they” want, is it? Oh, Mikey, you really should think before you speak – or, more to the point, you should let someone else think for you, being as you are so bad at it.

You, Michael Fuck-it-up Brown, are telling the American people, on a nationally-televised pretend-news outlet, that the President, his staff and supporters “want” the worst case scenario to unfold for political purposes? And that purpose is to heed the warnings of environmentalists who “want” to save the planet (which our nation is situated upon, in case you haven’t noticed), and “want” to see to it that regulations (ooops – naughty word in your world) are not only put in place, but are enforced so that this type of “accident” doesn’t happen again?

Jesus Hussein Christ, Brownie – we always knew you were a dimwit; you didn’t have to spell it out for us.

As for the statement that “they don’t say these things without it being coordinated”, I couldn’t agree with you more. We all know who “they” are – and we’re seeing, ad nauseaum, the way they’re “co-ordinating” their tiresome little talking point that Katrina and the present situation are exactly alike.

Cavuto: “But leaving aside what our future exploration plans are, he said early on he relied on reports coming out of BP, remember, when all those guys were injured and eleven went missing, that BP said that it had it relatively contained, and that those were the early reports he relied on. How is that different than the argument your former boss made that local authorities on the ground felt that, ahead of the disaster, things were relatively contained?”

Brown: “Here’s what is different, because we were actually on the ground also. We knew what was going on and how bad it was and kept reaching back to the White House, saying, we need these things. We need X, Y, and Z.”

Yeppurs, Brownie, we all saw you on the ground, “knowing” how bad it was and what was needed. Guess someone should have explained to you how to “tweak” things so that lives weren’t lost. Guess someone shouldn’t have appointed a dipshit who had spent the previous decade as the stewards and judges commissioner of the International Arabian Horse Association as the head of FEMA in the first place.

But, hey, that’s all water under the bridge now – or water over the heads of those who drowned as a result of your amazing ineptitude.

I don’t know what enticement Blunder-Puss was offered to appear in public and berate the current President – but whatever it was, it will undoubtedly prove to be small compensation for proving himself to be even more of a self-absorbed idiot than we’ve already come to know and loathe.

Perhaps Dick Cheney has invited Heckofajob to join him at his undisclosed location, where he can kick himself in the ass for having reminded the public that he still exists, as dumb a fuckhead as he ever was - only more so.